Saturday, August 27, 2011
I told myself that here in the beginning that I would blog about it whenever I had difficulty or struggles with eating this way. Well it's day 2, and I don't know that what I'm having here is as much a struggle as it is a realization. I used to have serious issues with food and it's emotional qualities. I was depressed, I ate, I was bored, I ate, I was happy, I ate. Most anyone can tell you that regardless of whether it's beer, a crack rock, or a nacho, people look for emotional relief in things that aren't necessarily the best for them. I've come along way from my crack nacho days, but I think today for some reason is reminding me of how true it is that those feelings don't ever completely go away. I've been up since 5 working at a cross country meet, it's hot, I'm tired, and nothing sounds better than to toss down 1,000 calories of something friedcheesysalty and nap for the next couple of hours, but honestly, I'm not hungry. I ate a great breakfast and a light but very sensible lunch, and I don't NEED any more fuel to do the laundry and sit on the couch. My mind wants something, because it has gotten used to being satiated by food. It's something I worked really hard to get through, and it stings a little bit to see them still hanging around. At the same time, the good news comes from the same place. I've been here before. I know enough to know what this REALLY is. Something that excites me very much about this way of eating is that it is treating food as fuel, and that's it. I'm fueling my body to work, whatever that work may be, not looking to fulfill my emotional pangs.
Posted by Will at 11:38 AM